The First Cut is the Deepest.*

My high school best friend, Armie, called me up just before quarter to ten o’clock this evening. She was all set to board her plane that would bring her far, far away from here. Far away from us….

Okay, before I get too teary-eyed over this, let me just vindicate myself a little by saying her leaving is really difficult for me. I guess its hard to say goodbye to someone you’ve practically known your entire life, back when you were donning flowered tiaras to your First Holy Communion, back when you were enjoying how nice it was to be talking on the phone for hours. Armie was the first person I’ve ever called when we had our first landline number. She has been there through the good (hair) days and the bad. Going through the 'bopor' days under Mrs. Laig's class.*shudder* The first crushes and the first loves. Serious problems. The boy bands and the girl bands. Countless other fads. And Leonardo DiCaprio.** (Oh yes, I should just include that….)

*sigh*

I’ve always looked up to Armie since time immemorial. Even back in 2nd grade, she was one of the tallest and smartest kids in the block. Our teachers called on her often, and she often recited in class and led the prayers and such. She was consistently top one in our classes, and she won all of the history quiz bees. She was really pretty and had the best script handwriting I’ve ever seen – a penmanship I still try to emulate to this very day whenever I write in script. But despite all her winning attributes, she was humble and she never had any mean bone in her body.

Suffice to say, everyone in class liked her. There was even this ‘pretty’ boy (pretty because I find his features more girlish than boyish) who even got teased to her. Hehe…(to people who might know, ask niyo na lang ako.:))

Sometimes I wonder – how did a klutz such as me end up having Armie, the poster child for grace and poise, for a best friend? Even though we have lots of things in common (being an only child for starters) sometimes I feel that we’re poles apart. Hmmm…maybe we have the kind of friendship that complements rather than negates.

***
Anyhow, I’ll miss Armie terribly. Last night, when we met up for dinner (Me, Marvin, Jen, and Armie) I tried to lighten things by focusing on trivial stuff like her meeting someone who looks like Gael Garcia Bernal in Miami. (Oh gosh. If that would really happen…sigh.) And for a while it didn’t seem like she was going away. It felt like we were just having a dinner out and we were enjoying the night.

But when she hopped on the cab, I felt sad. I guess the last image I have of her – her back turned to us as she entered the cab – I guess the finality of it kicked in. After nearly sixteen years of knowing each other, we would soon part ways.

In a way I’m scared because her leaving is one of those ‘defining’ moments in our lives. It’s a reminder than we are growing up, and growing old. And part of growing up means learning to move on no matter where life takes us. And part of me does not want to grow up. I’m also apprehensive because I don’t know what’s in store for Armie. And I won’t be around to hear about it or come by her side when she needs it.

But I’m also happy for her because I think she’s headed for a place where she can realize many great opportunities. I’ll be crossing my fingers and toes for that.

We haven’t come full circle yet. Our journey has just started.

*This is a title of a song that Rish emailed me a couple of months ago. It’s from that show The O.C. Anyway, the lyrics of this song does not really convey how I feel at this moment, but the melody does.

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT LIKE Leonardo DiCaprio. I was merely the one who gave Armie that scrapbook.

My best friend and me throughout the years…


After our reco when we were in 3rd year.


Our grad ball. Gosh. I really hate me with makeup. Armie, on the other hand, just looks classic.


2003 A.D. I'm in pink stripes (obvious) while Armie is clad in that Jerry Yan shirt. (not-so-obvious)


a picture with another close friend, Soo Yeon, and Clinton, the dog.^^