I just downloaded MYMP's "Kailan". The voice of the lead singer of MYMP (Chin Alcantara) is just so cool and soothing. And I stumbled upon this lyrics box as well.:)

A couple of things I’ve learned in the past year:

1. I’ve learned some things about materials. (Duh)

2. We should have had our lanai renovated AFTER I moved to my current office. Though I’m still proud of my work, my exposure to finishes increased thrice only after two months of working in my current office, and I could have cut down on costs. Sayang. Tsk tsk

3. Love does come when you least expect it.:)

4. Loyalty cannot be bought. It is earned.

5. The art of saving is just as important as the art of spending, especially when you worked hard for the moolah.

6. I am still a 16 year old trapped in a 23-year-old…status. I didn’t say body, since I would have to disagree with that.

7. Even though I still don’t consider myself as a full-fledged adult, it doesn’t faze me anymore to learn that people my age are settling down and being concerned with other adult matters.

8. In connection to #5, I still have a lot of things to learn about adult world. One thing I want to master is the art of bluffing. I can see that a lot of them bluff through things, and they’re damn good at it.

9. Some of the most difficult people I’ve worked with were people coming from my alma mater. Joyce actually agreed with me on this one. Why is that?

10. Now is the time to be kikay, or at least conscious of things like my skin, my hair, etc. I’m not getting any younger.

IT’S ALL IN MY MIND.
Once again, it’s Friday. I was supposed to leave earlier than my usual because I wanted to enjoy early nighttime Friday at home, but then again I got affected by the people in the office…I can’t help but pitch in to help them out.

*Sigh*

I wish everyday was a Friday night. It’s only when I started working when I began to realize how important Fridays are. It’s truly a luxury just letting things be. I don’t feel obligated to think about anything or anyone…well, at least people I deal with professionally.

Hehe.

Random things on top of my head:

#1 I think I should treat myself to a hair relax (tama ba yung term? I'm so clueless, I swear). The little-girl-lost look worked during my college years…hmmm…but it doesn’t jive with my uniform/s in the office. Everyday seems like a bad hair day – doesn’t match the supposedly “professional” look I should project. Hmmm…tomorrow should be a good time.

…Or should I grow my hair longer first? Right now it just went past my shoulders.

#2 Marvin said he had a hard time during the board exams. Shucks.:( Hopefully it would go from worse to better.

#3 Any solutions for corns? As much as I hate to admit this, I do have, no thanks to high heels.

#4 I’m excited to start reading a book about Norman Foster’s works that I borrowed from Meg. Inspiration! I should do more to feed my mind.

***
One random thought that isn’t really random is the fact that…oftentimes I just feel like going through the motions…that I’m searching for something that I still can’t pinpoint what.

Why is that?

I work 8 (or so) hours a day, 5 (or 6) times a week, with 48 (or less) hours of free days called weekends…my mood these days…as much as I want to have a diversion – aka “life” – I want a break – aka rest – from my real life.

…To simply let things be…just like what I wrote in the second paragraph of this entry.

Is this part of soul searching? To want to stare at the 4 corners of the wall in my room?

Maybe the challenge is to find inspiration for higher learning even being far away from the four walls of the classroom…

Dunno.

NUMBER 3.

*Theme from Spiderman runs in my head*

Today, I can say with certainty that I had a great day.

For the first time in many weeks, I feel like smiling. No, there wasn’t really anything really exciting that took place today, but I suppose I just felt that in many weeks, I felt that working makes sense. I don’t feel like dragging my feet to the office anymore. I don’t feel … enslaved.

For starters, my lady boss didn’t feel grouchy or picky today…well, at least not so much. We were discussing about the type of stones to specify for the flooring and countertop of one of our clients. I used to dread those types of discussions because I always feel unprepared to face her, to take in on what would be another “flighty” decision on her part.

Well, today, she seemed game to accomplish a lot of things, and for the first time, I shared her enthusiasm to help her finish those things. I guess it’s probably because I’m beginning to jive with her. I can pick up from where she left off, not just merely take in everything what she says and wonder what that was, where to find that, what to do with this type of finish, etc. I realized I’m not so clueless about materials and suppliers anymore! I can answer her questions with confidence.

***
I also talk with a lot of suppliers in the course of my work…well, at least current work. (More on that later.) Sometimes there would be walk-in suppliers, and today was no exception. Two of those walk-in suppliers dropped by the office earlier, and I was happy to note that both of them proved to be worth my time.

One of them, a representative from a big bathroom fixtures distributor, gave me brochures that contained a lot of the things I felt that my lady boss would want. Why was that? I’ve been searching for a lot of ‘particular’ styles of fixtures and fittings the entire summer, and I found nearly all of them in one set of brochures – from one distributor! Imagine? The ones I was interested in were the inexpensive Chinese versions of the European brands I’m familiar with, but I’m willing to bet that those products, coming from a well-established distributor, would deliver.

About the other supplier, let me just say for one thing that the second supplier was DROP DEAD GORGEOUS. As in. He looked like a movie star. At first I couldn’t understand why Tin was making a big fuss about this particular supplier, but when we were introduced – ah, I immediately understood. I had a hard time putting on a poker face while he was talking about his product, which were different stones – limestone, sandstone, etc. But in keeping a straight face (and yeah, trying to speak in whole English sentences since he didn’t seem to speak Filipino) I even learned a thing or two from him – something that would greatly help with what my lady boss and I were discussing regarding stone floor finishes. O di ba timely?

…Too bad nalaman ko bading pala yun (after sharing my “starstruck” experience with officemates). Haha. Sayang! Joke.:D (Don’t worry hon, you’ll still be the cutest guy for me ever.;) )

***
I went home with Suzette, one of my friends from the office. I learned from her that the reason why she goes to site more often these days was because the 2nd floor slab was being poured into place. (Tama ba English ko? Haha.:D) I got interested and started asking a lot of questions, and she answered a lot of those.

It was only through that talk that I realize how crucial the ‘buhos’ was – in order for that to commence with it everything should be in place -- the wiring, the plumbing, the beams…everything. Suzette had to count for herself every rebar that was there before the pouring of concrete could take place. Needless to say, I really find the whole process fascinating. I hope that someday I would get to see for myself all these things taking place.

I’m also happy for Suzette – after being the subject of my boss’ ire for nearly two months because of something that went amiss with that same project, she was now being commended for it. At least Suzette was able to redeem herself.

***
I’m happy because for the first time in many weeks, I feel inspired to work. I finally feel that I didn’t leave my former job for something more….unstimulating than my previous work. Learning and experiencing things like what I’ve gone through earlier – that’s the reason why I ventured to get out of the safe, straight, and seemingly secure path with my former office.

Nope, I don’t think I’ll really get over my wariness of people in authority, but in time I’ll be able to work more confidently with them. I just feel that today is one of those days that makes me feel a bit closer to realizing my dream of … someday being the one specifying what type of material we’ll be using for the floor, of counting rebars of the structure that I once planned on paper, and of witnessing the edifice I designed slowly taking shape.

I hope.

Anyway, did I mention that today marks my third month in the office?

Something I've long wanted to post.

UPDATE

I don't know when I transformed into such a jaded individual. Or such a nutcase. I think I've been ranting and ranting about how...I managed to dig myself into a hellhole (in My's words) and sadly still, my self-proclaimed decision to stay there.

I'm a sucker for pain, I know.

Maybe I should look into the bright side...what bright side? I don't want to feel guilty about ranting in my own blog...

So sue me.

It's been a long, long time since I've blogged. Dunno...I guess I just feel that there's really nothing interesting that's happened lately that's worth mentioning. Not even flashes of inspiration, thought, or genius.

...Hmmm...there's nothing really much to talk about myself except work. And since I don't want to go into details about my work, let me just talk about the one time I actually went to site. I mentioned about it in my previous blog entry.

Anyway, I went to Ayala Greenfields last Monday. The abaca curtain contractor had to install the remaining pieces of curtains in our client's house, and usually somebody from our office goes with the installer. Last Monday though, Irene, the girl who usually goes to site, got sick. Thus, I filled in for her.

I'm happy that I had the opportunity to go! The view from our client's house was so beautiful. From her balcony, one has a clear view of earth and sky. The Laguna de bay could also be clearly seen from her balcony. Too bad my phone can't really capture the entire scenery in detail.

Also, our client was really nice and accommodating -- I was chatting with her while the abaca contractor worked quietly in the background. She made us feel right at home, telling me to explore the house as much as I liked. She even gave the contractor a really nice tip - enough for gas money and more than enough meal.

Anyway, in many ways I'm really glad -- Mondays are usually stressful days for me, and the unexpected site visit proved to be just what I needed to deflect the pressure Mondays usually bring.

***
And then earlier, Irene, Hanzel and I tried out the food at Irene's family's new Japanese restaurant near Moonwalk. Yum! The place was so cozy and the food was really fresh. Hopefully I could drag Marvin to that restaurant.